Sometimes it’s good to be cautious. Think twice about your decisions, avoid rushing into things that have the potential to blow up in your face. But when should you draw the line? When is does being cautious go from responsible to a warning that you’re entering territory that you shouldn’t be?
If what you were doing is what you really wanted, eventually you have to stop proceeding with caution and just jump in, right?
I call myself an environmentalist. I harp on people who drink water from plastic bottles, I lecture my friends about the ins and outs of recycling, I’m a proud vegetarian and I of course have dedicated my University studies to greening our communities and protecting our natural resources. I frequently boast about shopping in thrift stores and that one time I washed my hair with baking soda. I read about a billion articles a week on National Geographic, Tree Hugger and any other new outlet that highlights environmental issues. I lecture my coworkers about using the compost properly; I carry a travel mug portable silverware wherever I go. I’d like to think I’m dedicated.
But this past weekend, I, the so-called “environmentalist”, did absolutely nothing to celebrate earth day…and I’m ashamed. Unless you count a lame Facebook status and the fact that I took advantage of Starbucks environmental efforts by nabbing a free coffee in my $20 travel mug. Of course I could take some of the heat off of myself by pointing out the fact that Starbucks is a billion dollar, Multi-national Corporation (that sounds right, right?). And all they did was give away a few cups of coffee, which they likely paid about 10 cents a bag for, while simultaneously charging $10 for a muffin that was shipped in from god-knows-where. But that’s an entirely different rant.
Back to my original point, I know what you’re thinking… “This bitch lectured me about my carbon footprint and she couldn’t even get off her couch to plant a goddamned tree on the most sacred tree hugging day of the year?!”
I’m sorry, Earth. That’s all I can say. I know it’s too little too late and a promise to do better next year will likely mean nothing to you. For the next year I will work overtime to make up for my unacceptable behavior. Next year, it’s all about you and me, babe. I’ve only got eyes for you; you are my world, no pun intended.
I had a crazy good day today, and I can’t explain why. I’ve just been in the best mood all day for no good reason. And knowing that makes me even more happy. It’s great when you’re happy because something good happened, but it’s extra special to be happy just beause 🙂
I found some of my high school yearbooks under my bed today and they offered the perfect distraction from the things on my Saturday to-do list. Whenever I look at those yearbooks, I think about how different my life is now. My location has changed, my hair has changed, my wardrobe is completely different (thankfully) and I’ve changed. My personality, my sense of humour, my interests and my pet peeves have all been altered to some degree in the past few years.
But then I started think about the more recent changes, high school was only 3 years ago, but that is still plenty of time for change. But, it has really been this past year where the real change happened. I feel like I finally outgrew myself. I made some amazing friends and lost some not-so-amazing friends. I experienced more new things in the last year and a half than I think I did through all four years of high school. I’m still negative and moody, I still procrastinate like nobodies business and I still cry too much. But those are traits that I think I’ll carry with me forever, whether or not I want to. The change that has really happened has had more to do with how I feel about myself. I’m still shy and not super confident, but those traits don’t hold me back as much. I know who I am now, and I like who I am, which has always been a problem for me. I was constantly trying to change my self, to force myself to act more happy and more outgoing, and now, I’ve finally learned to love myself, just the way I am.
The weirdest changes that have happened this year are the people that have come and gone. People that I was sure would be important parts of my life, just aren’t anymore. And people that I wouldn’t have expected to stick around, have. Most of these changes are for the better, but they’re still weird.
This post is a little too self-insulgent for my taste, but I can’t help myself when I’m trying to avoid doing other things.
I’m not really a nerd, but I agree with this. Whenever I get really excited about something, and express my feelings of excitement openly, there is always someone around who gets embarrassed> Embarrassed because I’m excited and apparently, the cool kids don;t get excited about stuff.